It is difficult, if not impossible, to manage or control anger. Control is the problem, not the solution. You can control many things in the world, but when you try to control what is between your ears, you will fail miserably.
Dealing with anger issues can be very simple, yet extremely difficult, because you have learned to react the way you do. You cannot "unlearn" it because the mind is a one-way street of sorts, once "it" is in there, "it" is there for good. However, you can learn new ways of responding to angry thoughts, changing the context rather than the content. Let me briefly explain.
You could practice accepting angry thoughts, which cause angry emotions, just as they are, non-judementally, in the present moment. Those thoughts, which may be true or valid, or may not be true or valid, are most likely not productive. So, by accepting the thoughts for what they are, merely thoughts, you can let yourself experience any valid anger rather than pushing it away or you can simply observe the thoughts and not attach any judgment or importance to them. In either case, you now have control over the process (context) and how you react to the thoughts.
I said it is simple because it is. It is as simple as accepting thoughts, sensations, behaviors, memories, and emotions for what they are and without judgement. Becoming competent at doing that is the difficult part. It takes practice, mindfulness practice, every day of the week for the rest of your life. Would you trade a life complicated by anger, anxiety, depression, shame, guilt (etc, etc) for one of calmness and tranquility if I told you it would take only 5 to 30 minutes a day?
The mindfulness-based cognitive behavioral therapies (DBT, ACT, MBMT) are not just for "crazy" people, but for anybody who is tired of letting their thoughts and emotions run their lives. It is a positive psychology in the sense that we train ourselves to look at negativity as a transient state and is based on the traditions of Zen Buddhism while incorporating modern, effective cognitive behavioral techniques based on the latest scientific research.
There are 15 episodes of BODY-MIND-BEHAVIOR (BMB) BASIC TRAINING on my YouTube channel: CombatCounselor Channel can read more on our website, www.KCCBT.com and my blog, The CombatCounselor Chronicle. You can also follow me on Twitter @CombatCounselor or LIKE my Facebook page: Like CombatCounselor on Facebook . You can also search using the terms mindfulness-based cognitive behavioral therapy and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT).
Don't forget to follow @CombatCongressman on Twitter, subscribe to his blog CombatCongressman Connection, visit his website CombatCongressman.com AND VOTE FOR THOMAS C. SORRENTINO IN THE 2014 MIDTERM ELECTION - MISSOURI'S 6TH CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT!
Don't forget to follow @CombatCongressman on Twitter, subscribe to his blog CombatCongressman Connection, visit his website CombatCongressman.com AND VOTE FOR THOMAS C. SORRENTINO IN THE 2014 MIDTERM ELECTION - MISSOURI'S 6TH CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT!
